Father’s Day has come and gone. Yet the weight of this day dedicated to celebrate our fathers has not left my heart…
To the women of Scarred Beautiful who do not know the safety of the care and love of a father, whose only image of the one male that was supposed to hold you close as a precious gift from God, called to protect you, feel loved without intention and provide true safety in his arms; yet that man instead defiled his authority, his protection and his affection to you. To those women, I write you today, from one woman to another to say, “I am sorry.”
I am so sorry that the laughter of the little girl you once were was silenced. I am sorry that the words “beautiful” and “lovely” are painful memories. I am sorry that the one who was supposed to reveal to you how worthy you are in God’s eyes, robbed you of your self-esteem.
Yet, the truth is, you are worthy, you are precious, you are valuable and that little girl that never felt the freedom to twirl down the hallways of her home, or dance to the songs of the birds in her backyard, is longing to be released and she is still inside you. That man took from you, but he did not take your spirit, he did not take your value, he did not take the true beauty that is within you.
Although your young heart learned only of the meaning of a “father” from one who violated the title he did not deserve, I write to you to introduce you to a Good Father.
There is One who through each tragedy, held you in His arms when you left your body and found a place far away. That was Him… He held you. There is One who wept with you, and continues to weep, when you weep. There is One who knows you, your silent prayers, your unfulfilled dreams, your joy and your sorrow. There is One who waits with arms that are wide. Those arms are safe, they will never hurt you, they are pure and His love for you will cover your wounds, wipe away your tears and bring you healing.
So many times, we blame God for allowing bad… even horrific things to happen. Yet we fail to see that it was Him who comforted, soothed and even carried us through. Some of us have pasts that are ugly and we live with the scars as a result. Yet there is a Good Father whom if we just give our pain to, if we cast every care and every terrible wound upon Him, He turns the very ugly things we hide into our beautiful.
What the Good Father is speaking to you today is that He knows that your past was terrible, He knows you were innocent, He knows you were hurt. What you endured was wrong. He sees this and calls to you that it is okay to weep for the child who is within, but also see the woman who has overcome as He sees her. She has risen from the ashes of those who stole and she is now the victor. He wants you to know that your beauty surpasses those of the average, because you have come from the depths of darkness and risen above… and you still love, you still care, this is your power.
The Good Father calls you beautiful just as you are… and He wants to redefine what beautiful means in your heart. He calls to you and says “You are worthy and precious in His sight.” No matter the circumstances or hardships that are now behind you, or those that lay ahead, He will not leave you, He will not forsake you.
God is a Father who can redefine a role that was once abusive, He can be that safe place we can run and find comfort.
Come to the Good Father. He waits for you. He loves you, not in spite of your scars, but with and even because of them. Let Him speak to you, let Him say these words over you today,
“Where you see shattered, I call Whole.
Where you see damaged, I call Mended.
Where you see broken, I see Beautiful.”
Today can be the beginning of a new relationship with your true Father. Join me.
-written by Andrea Casteel Smith, author of Scarred Beautiful